“Immortals” Ungodly, but Visually Wowing


Genres: Action/Adventure and Fantasy
Running Time: 1 hr. 50 min.
Release Date: November 11th, 2011 (wide)
MPAA Rating: R for sequences of strong bloody violence, and a scene of sexuality.
Distributors: Relativity Media

Director: Tarsem Singh

JJ Rating: C+

Theseus (Henry Cavill) needs to keep King Hyperion (Mickey Rourke) from releasing the Titans and the whiny gods will not interfere, or so some say. Immortals.

3 Great Things About This Film

  1. Visually stunning, just like 300 and The Fall. Most of the fighting was eye candy greatness and this film is, as one of the trailers claim, better than any Twilight film.
  2. Henry Cavill did a fantastic job. He's got greatness in him. I could do all that work to pack on that muscle, so he's also awesome for having that ability.
  3. I really liked the arrow weapon.

5 Bad Things About This Film

  1. How they portrayed the gods. Wimps of the wimps, good grief. I couldn't even tell that was Ares until I read the credits. If they said his name in the film, I dismissed it, cause uh, he doesn't look like an Ares at all. Nope. Where were their powers? Seriously.
  2. The fights were almost all good, but some of them were just far too unnecessarily bloody. Unless I'm mistaken, gods bleed gold or something, not red.
  3. I couldn't stand the clothes they wore. It was as if they were on the catwalk for a freak clothes designer. It screamed WUSS from all of them, even the female god. It is possible.
  4. I wanted the gods to use their powers, but aside from Poseidon, none did. No lighting from Zeus. What the hell?
  5. The lines were bland. I wanted greatness and all I got was crap that probably came from an Occupier, I'm sure.

I love stories about Greek gods cause they are very creative, but sometimes people interpret everything in such a way that boring is all they produce. Immortals is a rental/Redbox/Netflix for sure.  

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