Survivor Redemption Island - E7 - It Wouldn’t be Survivor without STUPID

This season of Survivor is brought to you by people who are oversensitive. First Steve whined about his name written down twice and now it’s Sarita whining about her name was written down twice. Get. Over. It. In the game of Survivor people write down names. If that’s going to hurt your feelings that someone wrote your name down, then don’t write their name down. Douchebag.

Sarita even went so far as to say David picked the dark side. Yeah, more like the right side. You are a weakling. No one in their right mind would pick you for their team. They’d just forget about you. You wouldn’t even be last picked. You’d be picked not at all.

On Redemption Island, Stephanie yaks about food. She annoys Matt. Matt told her, “You’re killing me Smalls.” That made me like him EVEN more. He quoted Sandlot. One of the best movies ever.

Phillip says he doesn’t trust Boston Rob, that he’s controlling and he’s going to wait and get Rob when the time is right. Phillip sees Boston Rob far more clearly than most people in this game. That’s good and bad. Boston Rob says that Phillip is one of the most unaware people he knows. That would be wrong, he’s aware. Phillip has gone from crazy loony bin weird to a bit saner. Maybe the loner he stays out there, the saner he’ll get.

The Duel between Stephanie and Matt is a big memory game. Stephanie looks scared after Jeff explained the game. Matt found a match in his first turn. Stephanie did as well. Soon Matt found five and Stephanie lost.

Boston Rob and Phillip sit on one side. Ralph and David on the other side. Ralph and Phillip look happy that Matt won. Boston Rob look scared and pissed that Matt won and David look sad that Stephanie is now gone.

Stephanie spoke up and told Ralph that Sarita is weak, get rid of her. She turns to Boston Rob and told him to watch out because they’ll be gunning for him. Phillip told Matt he is a Samurai Warrior. Matt appreciates that, I find it creepy.

Phillip makes the mistake of asking Boston Rob what will they tell the rest of the tribe. Boston Rob uses that question and turns it on Phillip when he tells the rest of the tribe that Phillip wanted to hide things from them. If they lose, he’ll want to vote out Phillip. He wants to (instead of blindside) front side Phillip. Haha, he be funny.

Ralph says hat David will flip and that lawyers are hard to trust. I agree that they are, but David is right. Sarita is weak sauce. WEAK.

There’s this stuff called crispies that is the crispy bits of rice and Boston Rob likes that. Phillip flips that the tribe is saving so much for Boston Rob and treating him like trash. He deserves better treatment, why? Because he’s OLD. That’s what he says. Someone has too much love for Japan. Far too much. And with that comment, I hope Boston Rob’s Tribe loses Immunity. I want Phillip to go and David to stay.

Immunity/Reward Challenge
Jeff asks if they’re ready and Phillip is sure of it and over annunciates WE ARE. They have to get three bags full of balls and get those balls into a basket to win.

Russell’s Ex-Tribe decides that it’s best to use Sarita to get the first bag off the poll spiral thing. She is five times slower than Boston Rob. Boston Rob’s Tribe rockets ahead. Only to fall behind because Phillip turns into old man slow and can’t get through the net crap fast enough. Russell’s Ex-Tribe drops Sarita like a bad habit and use David. They speed ahead and get to tossing their balls into the net first. They were making great progress until Boson Rob’s Tribe catches up and Grant sinks some balls in the net. Boston Rob’s Tribe wins. Russell’s Ex-Tribe loses because Sarita sucks.

Boston Rob’s Tribe takes an awesome helicopter ride to an active volcano. Boston Rob loves it. Grant says that it was special time to spend with the tribe. Phillip turns gushy after eating food. He loves that they won. He loves his tribe. He loves and loves everything. Even the sky. He’ll make clothes for the tribe later out of crabs and leaves.

Boston Rob sees some yummy cookies that are cylinder like. He pulls them up and snatches the immunity clue. He hides it. Then tosses it into the volcano because he already has the immunity idol, it no longer matters. He’s fun. Phillip was gaining brain cells for the past two episodes and he didn’t figure that there would be a clue? Come on.

Sarita thinks that she can do whatever David can do, however she’s the reason they lost that challenge. If she didn’t have so much suck that ruin the tribes winning chances, then maybe she would be right. When she says that to Ralph, Ralph counters with David did well. Showing he wants to out her instead. David thinks he’s going. Mike wants to get rid of Sarita because she’s weak, but he’s not so sure he can trust David.

Tribal Council
Ralph spouts excuses because they lost. Jeff turns to David and asks him what excuses are for. David says excuses are for losers. Ralph agrees that he’s a loser. Smart thinking. David says that Boston Rob’s Tribe is together. His tribe is not.

Jeff uses the word cohesive and Ralph says he doesn’t know what that means. David laughs. Only fair since Ralph mocked David a while ago when David was talking about fishing. See, it’s smart not to harp on what someone doesn’t know, because you don’t know something they know. Duh.

Steve, the angry one that doesn’t like seeing his name written down (reminds me of Lex’s anger over his name written down--haha) thinks that they are working well together. David trusts the six of them as an alliance, but just not Sarita individually. Very lawyer like answer, that’s for sure. I like David, sort of. I’m scared he might go because this tribe is pretty much full of dumbos. This doesn’t mean I think they made a mistake getting rid of Russell. Russell sucks at challenges, so it’s not as if they lost someone great. It’s the fact they lost that ruined them.

Sarita votes David. David votes Sarita. Sarita got the most votes. She is gone. She says she wishes she brought her stuff. David told her not to get too confident. She sure shouldn’t have thought she was safe until she was sure she was safe.

Sarita is mad she’s gone and that they should have voted out David due to the fact that the merge is coming up. They probably thought about Redemption Island and didn’t want to send David there and he beat Matt only to return and ruin their chances of getting further. Getting rid of her was a “sure” thing that she would be gone. However, based on the previews for next week it might be her returning if Matt’s foot injury ruins his chances of his wonderfully great winning streak.

Next week the winner will return to the game with the merged tribe. That will rock if it’s Matt.

On a side note, the women look prettier the longer they stay out there. Which is ruined in the final show when they make up too much. Ruining their natural beauty.

The Caustic Survivor Fan has spoken…

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