Survivor Redeption Island: EP- 5 - Russellites’ Bite Strength Level is Grandma No-Teeth

I’ve decided that I’ll start using their real names with their nicknames as last names. Therefore, instead of Agent Dumb I will write Philip Agent Dumb. It’s getting hard giving nicknames, especially to the boring ones.

Philip Agent Dumb thought that he deserved to be loved by everyone, but especially the girls that would rather love the dirt he walks on than him. Boston Rob enjoys that Agent Dumb pisses people off, even him. He believes that Philip Agent Dumb should stick around. What is weird is that he has moments of clarity that make sense. He analyzed the girls in how they react to him and where he sits in the hierarchy of the tribe and it sounds very sound until he goes off on a loopy end. Destroys that. As well as his nasty red underwear.

On Russell’s Extribe, they want to keep the Russellites (Krista Beach Blond and Stephanie Whore Waitress) so that they’ll be strong in numbers after the merge. Julie Firefly didn’t care where they went. She does not like them. They don’t act like people worth liking. The Russellites want to flip to Boston Rob’s tribe. They told Boston Rob and Grant Thor that at Redemption Island. Smart move. Boston Rob also was at a lost for words when Matt asked him why Rob voted him off. He couldn’t give a straight answer.

Matt vs. Kristina Lady in Red
They had to collect heavy puzzle pieces to make a cube. Matt did it effortlessly. I loved how Kristina just tossed the pieces this and that way out of exasperation. Matt won. I hope he continues to win, but that’s a lot of hope.

Whore Waitress speaking up stating that she’s ready to flip. Boston Rob told them to hang in there. Hollow words. He doesn’t quite buy what they’re selling.

Phillip Agent Dumb compares all the girls (Natalie, Ashley, and Andrea) to crabs. Why? I don’t want to be sucked into the black hole of his thinking.

Andrea doesn’t like Ashley and Natalie, because they don’t do anything around camp. They be actin’ as if it’s a spa. She would rather get rid of them before Phillip. This episode I can see that, but then again Phillip is a ticking time bomb of stupid.

I thought Boston Rob might lie and say Matt was gone, but he told the truth. I think he’s feeling bad for voting out Matt and that, in the back of his mind, he’s thinking it’ll be his undoing if Matt keeps winning.

The Russellites wanted to stay away from their tribe. I don’t blame them. They are a little abrasive. Then that went away when Stephanie Whore Waitress stated that they voted him out for no reason. Uh, the reason was that he’s a terrible person who can’t seem to get his mind around how to play Survivor without stomping on toes so blatantly.

Mike Captain Average doesn’t see a risk for the Russellites being on the outs. The risk would be them flipping. Dur.

Before the challenge, Julie Firefly doesn’t want them to be cocky, bad karma. Foreshadowing.

Immunity/Reward Challenge was blindfold tribemates going around blindly as callers tell them where to get puzzle pieces and then the callers put the puzzle together. Callers were Stephanie and Boston Rob. Great choices.

My favorite part was Stephanie telling people to shut up and listen to her. If they listened to her more than talking over her, they would have won. That was part of the reason they lost. Ralph Farmer Bill couldn’t shut up and listen.

Boston Rob is great at puzzles and he won. They won sweet food and immunity.

They ate donuts and stuff. Grant Thor found a clue to the HI that Boston Rob already had in the coffee and shared it with Boston Rob. Boston Rob thought they should take the coffee with them. He pulled the clue out and told Grant to take the coffee back. While Grant Thor did as he was told, Boston Rob ran to switch the clue with the first one he had buried. When Grant came back they read the clue and Boston Rob played as if he had no idea and suggested (showing a lie) that they should burry it. That’s how he lies. I think you can tell when Boston Rob lies when he suggests what you should do. I’m going to pay attention to this next episode.

Russell’s Extribe got pissy up in a storm of piss because Stephanie didn’t do the puzzle right. DAVID should have done it. David Whine Bag was all whinny over it. Sarita Black Beauty was right. David would have SUCKED at calling and they would have never got the pieces. He’s also a lawyer and NEVER, EVER trust lawyers. They are the worst kind of friends to have because they aren’t really friends. They’re always wording things so they can’t be wrong. It’s obnoxious and yes, that’s a sweeping statement.

I don’t understand why they can’t see how Boston Rob was great and that greatness wouldn’t have been dimmed by David and his so-so puzzling skills.

I hate the phrase “they’re not playing the game” because it always comes form people that don’t like the way someone else is playing. In addition, Krista is a whiny blond.

Krista Beach Blond, at tribal council, tried to pull a Russell and spilled monkeys out of barrels and kittens out of bags in hopes of stirring up poo. She stated people were in pairs. I think that if you didn’t already know that you’re an idiot.

Jeff’s final words pushed the cracks that Krista’s words made. Hahah…love it.

The Caustic Survivor Fan has Spoken.

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