Survivor E15 - I Picked It Right

It’s a daunting task to sit here, type out the last blog on “Survivor Nicaragua”, then sit, and wait until February for the 22nd Season. I can’t read other people’s blogs on Survivor or go to that Survivor Sucks website, because they all suck. It’s like reading bitter people’s views on how the show should go. They run around trying to figure out every little thing before it happens. Why? Because they like to be the doouchebags? I don’t know. It’s not fun knowing. I don’t bother knowing. I just guess on what I see and refuse to over analyze it too much. What’s the fun in being told what’s always going on every moment? So I can dislike Jane because she’s not as nice as she seems? I’m sorry, but everyone isn’t as mean or nice as they seem…so what?

It’s not as if those people that were mean to Sugar were so sweet and cuddly that they should be respected and they were not as mean as Hitler was to the Jews. Woopty-do. Me calling them douchebags for what they did their season is perfectly fine. Even if I do call Bob a no good winner who didn’t do much to get there outside of crappy arts and crafts. I can say that even if I did think the idol was fantastically made only an idiot would fall for it. Moreover, one did.

I don’t need a Julian A-scrunchie (Assange or Assrange whatever) to release information on Survivor secrets or drama to make me hate it or appreciate it more. I just like it for what it wants to present itself as. That’s how people go about life anyway…liking things based on how it’s presented not for what it is. I mean if people liked things for what they really were Julian would be hated for being a creepy womanizer instead of a freer of information that’s everyone else’s but not his own.

This is the same reason why I like “American Idol” well…we’ll see about this year. The idea that everyone needs to know everything is not only stupid but also a total waste of time. I hate nosey people and I refuse to be a nosey person.

In addition, cynical people ruin the world. Always. And are terrible drivers. Cause traffic. Smell. Spread water on the bathroom floor because they don’t know how to dry themselves. Pee on the floor. Don’t know how to say please. Refuses to open doors for women with a bunch of bags. They kick people when they’re down. And they suck at being human.

All this need to have someone on Survivor that does all the conniving that supposedly Russell did in two seasons is a joke. Because when people catch on and vote someone like that out (this season’s Brenda and Marty) then all the sudden the dumb people are winning. Uh, no. If they are voted out, it’s because they weren’t smart enough to cover their tracks as they should have, not that they were dumb for voting them out.

Anyway on with the show….

Surfer looks to break the Trinity of Despots, he tries and no one wants to budge. Surfer is the one Sash wants out. He is good with saying that and then turning around claiming he’s watching Surfer’s back. The problem isn’t the lying. It’s that he’s so terrible at it he doesn’t even realize how bad he is. Surfer sees right through him no matter.

Individual Immunity back up for grabs. Answer questions, grab puzzle pieces and finish a puzzle. Surfer answers one question wrong. Everyone else gets them all right. Nevertheless, he’s quick enough to get all his pieces. Sash is his only competition. Chase is confused on how to do anything with the pieces.

SURFER WINS! Awesome. They have to sort of scrabble, but not really.

Holly wants Dan out. Dan wants Holly out. They both state the other is the threat. Surfer tries to get rid of Holly to keep Dan. Amusing moment…Surfer says that Chase is annoying on how he likes to come up and be nosey about what people are talking about. That is what douchebags do.

Holly made a super stupid mistake in getting rid of Jane last vote, because now she’s on the outs. She should have offered to get rid of Chase or Sash to Surfer and Dan. Now her problem is making it complicated for her to win because she’s looking like the threat.

At Tribal Council, the discussion is who is the threat. Is it Holly or Dan? Dan doesn’t need the money who would give it to him? Dan says that Holly’s the threat because she’s from a small town. It’s his perception, Jeff says. Therefore, it doesn’t matter if it’s right or wrong. It does come down to perception. I love that. That’s very true. That’s how Bob won instead of Sugar. Perception, not facts.

Chase makes a stupid comment about how he’s thinking. Uh, he’s never thought this entire game and it’s baffling how he made it that far on hollow sorries and crying over his life.

Dan is voted out. Should have been Holly. Dan speaks to the camera. He’s mad at his loss of shoes and says that Sash is whinny. He hopes Surfer wins immunity again.

Holly mentions that Surfer is a huge threat at the final immunity and she says that they have to stick together. Chase agrees. Chase makes a stupid comment (whoa shocking) about not liking the lying part. Well, now that you’ve done it so much you could very well be called a liar. It’s sad that you hate doing it but don’t do it well enough to make sure you don’t look bad. The sorry bit isn’t good enough…ever.

They go past voted out Survivors and take up their shields as they make small comments. Not great comments, by the way. Or the greatness was edited out.

Wendy Jo -- She says that she would have played different by stating how great she is. Shannon -- He didn’t want to babysit the children.
Jimmy Johnson - Special spot in Holly’s heart. -- Survivor drained him like nothing before.
Jimmy T. - Cannot control Survivor. Frustrating. Got knocked down to sized. Humbled.
Tyrone - Social would out weighted the physical. Didn’t adjust as quickly as he should have.
Kelly B. - Learned she was stronger than expected. She had thicker skin then imagined.
Yve - Didn’t take initiative---from this point on will in her life.
Jill - Social aspect was equally difficult. More so than physical.
Alina - Rather be eliminated because of threat. She’s proud of her game.
Marty - He did a little lying, stealing and cheating….but didn’t do that much. Love playing the game.
Brenda - Don’t know how strong you are until tested---really proud of how she stayed focused. -- They said a good, but she didn’t make it. Not so great.
Neigh the Quitter (big X on her shield) - Quit the game. Always friendly, smiled and thought she was the smartest and craziest. Hahaha….idiot.
Purple Kelly the Quitter (big X on her shield)…she says she’s not a quitter, but you are.
Benry - Thought he could win the immunities, unless puzzles.
Jane - Outdo any person with stamina -- go back with head held high.
Dan - He learned that he could survive in the wilderness. Not so angry if not get three meals a day.

At the top, they burn the shields in a fire.

Individual Immunity -- Sword, stack coins on hilt. Balance it or fail and lose chance to win a million dollars.

Holly out first.
Chase gone.
Before Sash loses the music and the tension of who would lose is awesome great.

He is the only one that tilted his sword to keep the coins balanced.

The liars congratulate him. He loves that the three of them have to plead for their life. He says it’s fun to watch them squirm. That is the awesome part of this.

Sash lies. As I watch him lie I realize that Surfer is keeping it bottled in until Tribal where he can turn them against one another. Sash thinks his lying is great and is working on Surfer when it’s not.

At Tribal Council Surfer holds in a smile. The Jury looks pleased over his immunity. Everyone wanted to talk to him about who he was voting out. Loved hearing them give their own version of what happened. Surfer states that Sash would have taken him to the end had he not won immunity. Chase speaks up about how that is a lie. They start going at one another and it’s not even the end. Just as Surfer wanted.

Surfer states that Chase and Holly were able to tell him the truth. Sash speaks up and says he’s more committed than Chase. Sash squirms because he’s not so sure he’s safe. Holly says that Sash is a huge threat. Surfer says it’s great that he doesn’t have to uphold any promises. Meaning he can vote for anyone he wants.

Their final begging has Sash say he’s honest. Chase says he’s pretty honest and Holly says that she respects Surfer.


Surfer, Sash and Chase are final three. Chase votes out Holly. Another lie racked up for the sweet buffoon.

Surfer feels a huge ten. He’s in a powerful position. He set the stage up for the final tribal by getting Chase and Sash at each other’s neck. Chase is under the impressions that he can bring thoughts to his hollow head. His thoughts did nothing to Surfer during Tribal so he wasted his time. Sash didn’t like being called out about not keeping his word with alliances.

Chase said that he never wanted to break an alliance. Yeah, okay. Sash calls them both his wingmen. Surfer laughs at that idea to the camera and says that Sash needs to take a backseat. They get food to celebrate their final three.

Chase tries to get inside Surfer’s head to give him over confidence. It won’t work. Why? Because Surfer has been playing this way since the beginning of the game. It’s not going to force him into a confident state. Chase is the one that has a little too much confidence in his position.

As always, they burn camp. Chase thinks he’s the underdog. Why? It’s like the Hulk thinking he’s the weakest person on the Avengers. Yeah, ok, I believe you. He thinks he might come in second, but doesn’t want to. I thought it would be third….he didn’t deserve second if it was based on how one played the game more than a smile and a heartstring sob story.

Final Tribal

Chase’s opening statement is one of the worst opening statements I’ve heard in a while. Something to do with it’s been an honor and he thanks them all for getting him there. He says bring on the questions too many times as he says sorry when he doesn’t mean it. Bleh.

Surfer’s opening statement is how he had a good time and he’s been in the clear most of the game. He asserted himself in the end winning the three individual immunities that he needed to win to find him in the final three. He deserves the money because he’ll have a lot of fun with it. He got the jury to laugh.

Sash’s opening statement is that the friendships he formed were important more so than any alliance. He hopes they’ll base their vote on outwit, outplay and outlast.

She greats them and congratulates them with a smile and a weird glassy eye look. Her statement about being proud of them sounds genuine. She enjoyed playing with Sash. How does he expect to get votes when he broke all his alliances?

Sash says he’s remorseful and that what happens in the game is strategy.

She says that she had an emotional attachment to Chase and how he stated he would never vote for her.

Chase answers saying he spoke to Holly and something about having to get a sixth person. He had no option. Good god, that stupid comment again about not having a choice but vote her out. Almost as dumb as the U-Turn not having a choice. These people cannot take what they do and say YES I did it. I had a choice and I chose to do what I did. Deal.

Sash comments saying Chase could never step up.
She votes Chase.

Did not seem so pissed at the Ponderosa, but apparently he let his pissness simmer. He says that there’s good reason they’re there and “we’re here. Hats off.”
He alludes to Chase being dummer than a bag of hammers by asking him to pick someone who was dumb as hammers but could not pick Marty. Chase refused to answer. He picks Marty, if he could.
He tells Sash that he was a Cerebral player (tells Chase that means smart). I love that. Chase had to be the dumbest of the three up there and the fact that he played too much with his heart and refused to take responsibility for his poor decisions points even more so to how dumb he was in this game.
Marty says that Surfer changed the most.

I don’t know why the women put on make up. They all (ALL OF THEM) look great without it. She asks Chase what he considered the best strategic move he made on his own? Meaning she didn’t think he thought of any moves on his own and based on what I saw, no he didn’t. Chase says at the beginning when he chose between someone people didn’t trust or four he could trust. Therefore, he took a chance and voted out Shannon. Uh, that’s not good enough and he had to stretch that one to make it seem like he was smart enough to be there. Wrong, not smart enough. Just like in the real world where those that lack in doing enough slip through the cracks and end up where they don’t belong. Chase just slipped through on his fake sorries and people buying into his nice guy act.

She asks Surfer if what he did was a little too late. Surfer says that his whole plan was to be friends with everyone and that winning the immunity was at the right time. Good answer.

Holly then asks Sash if he ever lied to her. Sash says that he did lie. He made a commitment to never write her name down, but they had to vote against each other. That doesn’t explain why he didn’t vote Chase. He apologizes to her.
She says that she respects them.
Voted Chase

Jane -- looks like she could kill someone.

She glares at Sash and says that he was raised to be a river rat and he needs to go back to the gutters to the black hole where he came from.
Chase pissed off at him, but he did make it a fun time. She asks him what he would do with the million dollars? Chase says that he will give $100,000 to a cancer thing. I don’t care. Why? Because he says this just to win not because he has a good heart. Then he adds that he’ll take care of his mom. Then Surfer jumps in and says that he would take care of his mom as well. Who wouldn’t? Yeah…duh Chase.
Voted Chase

Looks at Chase and says that he heard everything he needs from him. He is still, apparently pissed at the liar. I would be too. He lied unnecessarily.
He congratulates Surfer for winning the immunity three times in a row.
He says that he saw through Sash’s fake smiles and laughs. He asks where did he go wrong? Sash says that Benry should have mounted a counterstrike against him. I don’t think Sash was prepared for the onslaught that was aiming for him, which should have hit Chase harder

Lashes out as Sash calling him a liar and phony. He says that Sash said things he never lived up to, he hates that smile, and that he needs to medically fix that wink.
He says that Chase was a paranoid player of the entire game. He says that he hurt a lot of people on the jury and that he backstabbed Jane. He adds that Beauty fades, but dumb is forever. That’s for sure. So my favorite line toward Chase. Chase acted his age. Surfer did not.

Purple Kelly
Congratulates them all. They finished what she could not.
She wants Sash, in 60 seconds; state how he outwitted all of them. Sash says that he should have been voted out after the merge. He created many alliances and unfortunately he hurt many people. He says he’s trying to own up to it.

She says that Chase is her friend and that Surfer is her hippy buddy. She asks Surfer if seeing his mother at the reward gave him fuel to the end? Surfer says that he did not win the reward, but seeing his mother did give him fuel to the end. He got focus from her and there was a lot of emotion. He was jealous of the Despots Trinity’s alliance. He cries and they show some of the Jury crying as well. Benry cried...there must be more to that and what Surfer told about his relationship with his mom...probably making Chase more of a douchebag than he already was.

Says that Surfer is just a boy. I use to think I liked her and felt bad she was voted out, but if she’s that blind into what’s going on in the game she was a jury member of, then maybe she didn’t deserve to go further.
Sash comments that Chase is this and that Surfer is that. His votes got rid of people.
Chase was wishy-washy and should have gotten out of it.
Surfer states that he voted people out without harming anyone.
Voted Chase

Season old vs. young. Three from young in tribal. One winner.

Surfer - 5
Chase - 4

The dumbest voting ever. Come on, how could anyone vote for Chase. Does those pathetic sorries actually do something? I don’t know how someone could be his friend out there, if all he did was trying to get further by stepping on as many toes as possible knowing he could get away with it if he said sorry enough. Disgusting.

Chase, Sash and Surfer all look good at the reunion show. Though Surfer looked better with the longer hair.

Surfer is going to have a lot of fun with the money and put it into a production company. Something to do with communication and art…undermine the government *wink, wink*

Chase says that the lying drove him crazy. Jeff asks if anything is going on between him and Brenda. Someone shouts Showmance (I think that was Shannon). They both agree that they’re good friends. He didn’t ask for his balls back. Friends don’t take friend’s balls.

Why didn’t Sash give Brenda his idol? Sash says that Neigh told him that Brenda wanted to vote him off, so he decided not to give it to her. Therefore, I say sorry to him for calling him an idiot. Not an idiot for keeping the idol.

Brenda knew he might not give it, but hopped he would.

Jeff says he needs to publicly apologize to Sash for stating that he would be the first voted off. Sash says that he told him he’d see him on day 39. Haha. Awesome.

Chase is more interested in country music. He says that they don’t care if one is on Survivor. He plays his first single. Sounds pretty good, but that’s because I like country music. I may not like him, but I can enjoy his music. Just like I don’t like Tom Cruise, but enjoy his movies. I can separate.

Jimmy Johnson is 67 years old and Survivor saved his life because he had two blocked arteries and one time he tried out for Survivor they told him that is why he couldn’t be on the show. He fixed it, so he thinks he owes them a debt of gratitude for that.

Terry Bradshaw says that he was shocked to hear he was doing the show because he was sure he would kill himself. He says that Jimmy’s driven and he talked about the show a lot.

Holly says that the first few days of no sleep and no family and Dan rubbing her the wrong way made her act sillier than she needed to. She presented Dan with two boots made of quail ostrich. He appreciated it with a kiss on her cheek. Aww.

Dan wouldn’t mention how rich he was afraid of (jokingly) the IRS.

Jan talks about her prep. She says she was led to believe that there would be a lot of professional athletes on the show, so she prepared by doing a lot of physical things. She even made fire because of Jeff’s article about knowing how to make fire. There’s still animosity between Jane and Marty. They do not like one another. If it’s just a game that wouldn’t happen people. Not just a game.

When Jeff says Neigh there’s cheering and booing. She did get calls about her job, but she still has it. She works with kids as a PE teacher. She works at more than one school. Kelly says that she didn’t expect any better treatment for her missing leg. Neigh says she didn’t want to treat her differently, but she shouldn’t have said many nasty things she did state. She didn’t seem to have apologized for those nasty comments. Neigh says that she would have quit had it not been for Chase, but she didn’t vote for him in the end. Her vote was the major vote he needed to win.

Neigh’s mom not surprised by her daughter’s reactions, but she didn’t expect everything she saw and hear. Her mother says she’s a good girl and Neigh didn’t get that for her. It was amusing. Her mom threw her under the bus.

Jeff says that thanks to Kelly and Neigh from this point forward if you quit (other than medical or something else) they have the right to do what they want, which means pulling you off the jury.

Jane (meh) wins the $100,000 for favorite. Though I thought she would, it would have been nice if it were Surfer. Ha.

Jeff tries to get Shannon to redeem himself for his comments about gay people and women. Nevertheless, he didn’t catch on and it’s weird because it looked like Sash was trying to stick up for him, but Jeff was annoyed. There’s something more going on there. But guess what? I do not care.

Jeff says that the Survivor family is a Dysfunctional family, but they are now all a part of it. Boston Rob talks about his new baby. Adorable. They do make a great team, as Jeff points out.

Survivor Auction will benefit Operation Smile.

Next Survivor will be February 16th, 2011 called Redemption Island where when someone is voted off they will wait for the next person who is voted off and they’ll battle. Whoever wins will move on and fight the next person who is voted off. Eventually fighting their way back onto the game. The players of the game (unlike on the Pearl Islands) will be told about what happens when someone is voted off. Jeff Probst states that this will affect the way they vote people off. Yes it will. This is going to be awesome cool.

I am sad because the game is over. I am sad that Chase got so many votes and was not blasted as much as he should have been for being this Survivor’s Douchebag. I’m sad that I have to wait two months until the next one.

I’ll be back…to rant and rave.

The Caustic Survivor Fan has spoken…

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