Previously on Survivor the season of Stupid…
I cannot even begin to explain how stupid it was to keep Dan the crap knee old person who couldn’t even JUMP to throw a ball at the reward challenge. I wish they had lost just so they could suffer the pains of their stupid decision. Oh the best part of him not being able to jump was those that wanted to keep him were SHOCKED he couldn’t jump. SHOCKED. What? How can you be shocked? You knew his knees sucked and yet you kept him anyway.
I know I promised to use their real names, but it’s really, really hard to use Chase’s real name when he’s so ball-less. And it’s going to be twice hard to type out NaOnka when she’s a smelly hypocrite. NaOnka sounds too much like Wonka. As if she’s a character in a Darkwing Duck episode and instead of Nega-Duck she’s a Nega-Wonka mash-up…NaOnka.
Moving on to more dumb people, because this show has a whole slew of them, Jane is an idiot for not voting out Brenda when she had the chance. She also lies terribly and shouldn’t bother doing it…ever. Avoid talking about anything that would have her lie. She couldn’t even say she didn’t vote for Marty to Marty without laughing…which is a clear indication of lying.
It’s really hard to call Surfer Fabio. It’s so ick. I couldn’t even call him that if I was on the show. However, if I don’t call him Fabio those that watch the show wouldn’t understand who I was talking about if I said is real name, Jud. Therefore, I’ll stick with Surfer for the one or two people that are reading and my own comfort.
Surfer was one of the defenders who had to stand on a pole to jump and block the other team from scoring. He had to take turns with Chase (God I want to say no balls--his name has become synonymous with lacking) standing and defending on the pole. So they end up in the water switching out and that’s where Surfer decided to pee in the water.
Jeff asked him what he was doing and he said peeing in the pool and how the water is already dirty what’s the big deal. I admit that if someone said they were peeing in the pool I wouldn’t necessarily want to jump in after them, but when everyone groans like they've never peed in the pool…I rolled my eyes and shout LIARS. Everyone has peed in the pool. Everyone. They lie if they say they haven’t. Ha, ha.
Kelly S. said an amusing thing about milking. Instead of saying milking a cow she says, milk your own milk. She even made a face after she said it as if there was something wrong. I refer you back to how this is the dumbest group of Survivors. I did laugh, but seriously…this is why a person who skids by on life on her looks is in control with a weakling who pops his collar.
This links to Holly claiming, at the beginning of the season, that she reads people well. She reads people so well she believes words that come out of Chase and NaOnka’s mouth and is willing to vote out Alina who has never, ever complained about wanting to quit like her or NaOnka. It’s so pathetic that she reads people so bad that she should never, ever state she can read people again, because she cannot do it. At all. Period. Zilch. Anyone picking NaOnka or Chase over Alina is an idiot. Chase would be fine if he had the whole package.
I like Jan. She’s funny, she’s charming and southern and when they lost, she took it upon herself to go and catch fish. When she caught enough she ate one by herself. Reminded me a lot of the Ant and the Grasshopper. Smart lady, especially when Sash acts as if he’s a king and the older people are his slaves. I wonder if he’d state that if they weren’t white. Hum…
Anyway, Jan hated how Jill and Marty treated her. So how does she respond to the treatment when she has the upper hand? Does the exact same thing in return. I understand how frustrating it is to be surrounded by idiots, but to complain about how you’re treated only to turn around and treat people the same way doesn’t really bode well for your morality or character…and in this case…lack of.
I really believe Sash is a social retard. He claims his game is all about loyalty. Whatever, it’s about skin color. Joke or not, I’m going to make it stick this entire season until he proves otherwise. His character is as clean as mud in a pigpen.
As mentioned before, reward went to La Flor. They got to horseback and milk their own milk. All the while they get to relive Chase’s memory of his father. It’s touching that him and his father were so close and that this reward reminded him of his father…but this mushiness is meddling with what he already is lacking and that’s fortitude on being a strong enough player to withstand the idiots that’ll never grow out of being idiots. I get so frustrated with him because he’s actually more than who he’s stupidly aligned himself with. However, until he does something different, hell yes I’m going to bash him.
NaOnka is an idiot all over again. After whining about too much rain that reminded her about how terrible she was treated during her divorce, she turns around and mocks Alina for missing her family while they’re eating at the reward. The only reason she’d do that is she wishes she actually had a family to miss. I’m sure anyone that sees how she treats people surely wouldn’t want to be part of her new family. There’s not much up in her noggin other than self-centered entitlement.
Immunity challenge was one of my favorites because I got to see Brenda look disappointed that her team couldn’t get it together. Aww, if she kept Kelly Cool she would have won. Should have gotten rid of herself or Sash and her team would have won. Two weak people that perpetuate the loser mentality of the entire tribe. Her loserness is contagious and infects everything around her. How can anyone win with her around? It’s fun to say that. Plus it was fun watching her bicker at Surfer. That might push him to want to vote her out sooner more than later.
Jan needs to let the revenge mentality go, because it’s going to eventually get herself voted out. How can she possibly respect Brenda who can’t respect anyone that doesn’t look like her let alone bow to her every whim? She couldn’t respect someone who had one leg enough to vote her out because she doesn’t like her; she voted her out because of a disfigurement. She lacks respect and Jan cannot see that through all that wisdom she got from the cows on her farm.
Therefore, Sash and Brenda decide they’ll just ask for the immunity idol from Marty and vote him out. This idea is so far fetched how could it possibly work? OMG it does work. Sash goes up to Marty and spills an entire idea of how they’ll allow him to stay if he gives up the immunity idol, but Jill will have to go. Marty, stupid, decides that the idol would be best used to give to Sash instead of actually using it to save him should they all (as they plan) decide to vote him out. It didn’t make any sense on giving it to Sash so he could use it at a different time when Marty could use it himself and get rid of it while saving who he loves most…himself. Marty giving up the idol further proves this is the group of the dumbest Survivors in Survivor history.
Sash made the stupid comment that if he gives it to him that it wouldn’t fall into the wrong hands. He is the wrong hands. He proves that at Tribal Council where he states that he wants to keep it in case his alliance turns on him. Jeff asked him if he’d give it to Brenda, and he hesitated. It was so awesome watching his face turn from pure joy of having tricked Marty out of it to pure horror of what he revealed--his true intentions. Brenda and Surfer were taken aback by his words. Good.
They got their chance to vote out Marty, but instead they vote out Jill. They pass up an opportunity to vote him out and they merge next week. They screwed themselves royally. Sash had said that he was giving his word he’d vote for Jill and he wouldn’t want to go back on it. So in keeping with his word he’ll have to give back the immunity idol. We’ll see if he does that.
If I found out that I was going to be voted out, instead of sitting by and tossing up my hands I’d be campaigning telling people that they should vote for Brenda because she thinks she can get by on her looks. I’d say something. Never give up until your fire is snuffed. Why did Marty play like a weak fish? He’s no Russell or Boston Rob. He’s not even a hybrid. He tossed up his hands and gave up. These people…
Next week…more stupid because NaOnka is still there.
The caustic Survivor Fan has spoken. Until next time…