Survivor Day 11-14 - Episode 4 - Blindly Follow an Idiot and Winning You’ll Never See

Jolly Mean Giant (who I use to call Machete -- but he’s too wussy to be Machete) thinks he’s a great leader. How does he lead? Sing them to happiness…oh no sorry, obnoxiousness. He looks at how a pelican fishes, but does he go and fish…well the real question is how well he fishes? Not well at all. So far, he’s a SUCKY leader/replacement of Jimmy J. the best leader for the older tribe, ever.

What about The Electrocuted Idiot? Not a great leader either. Sucks at giving pep talks. He said one voice should tell who should do what at challenges. Really? You already had that and you voted him out and kept bum knee Mob Boss, who really hasn’t been showing much promise at getting better. His worth keeps on sliding and you keep on holding on to him like an idiot clinching Enron stock. Why? Oh, you like being a loser.

Jolly Mean Giant is NOT easy going, as he said. If he was, then him and the Electrocuted Idiot would be getting along. Instead they fight and fight and fight. Makes me want to sing the Itchy and Scratchy theme song.

Black Hypo took the hidden immunity idol, that she had help in finding, and put it into a sock and said “My sock”. Uh, no Mrs. Ghetto, that is not your sock. That’s not your sock. THAT IS NOT YOUR SOCK. First of all she didn’t figure out about the immunity idol clue and yet she took credit for it in front of the camera. Ursula told her where it was because why? She’s a smart one with puzzles. Why else ask her, idiot Black Hypo? Moron. Second, she didn’t even give her credit. Selfish and a whore, what more useless things could you be good at?

Anyway, Ursula could have turned herself into a beautiful Ariel if she took the clue and told Ball-Less about it, and they found the idol instead. But she’s not that smart or that cunning, which, by the way, she said she was in an earlier episode.

Black Hypo decides to try to get into Peg-Leg’s head with vile stupidity that would make an idiot cringe. But Peg-Leg didn’t give her an emotional win. She’s stronger, not only in challenges with one leg, but emotionally as well. Because if the trailers for next week are any indication, she’s going to cry and whine about how hard Survivor is. Unless that’s her acting to get votes to use the hidden immunity idol to toss someone she doesn’t like off.

Electrocuted Idiot gave a good nomination for Ticking Time Bomb to lead. He is in charge of telling people what to do at challenges. I think that it was a good choice. Phoenix (red head) decided that they should practice being blind folded. Fantastic idea. But it didn’t work as well as they’d hope because Jolly Mean Giant screws up at the challenge. Why? He sucks at listening.

They are blinded at the challenge and they need callers. Ticking Time Bomb is the caller for the older tribe and Ursula is the caller for the younger tribe. Why Ursula? Why not Black Hypo? She has the loudest and stupidest mouth. I’m pretty sure the entire nation can hear her when she yells. Guess she couldn’t handle the pressure. Shocker. Doesn’t matter the younger tribe uses the MoP and they get a head start that defiantly helped them win, but they didn’t really NEED it to win because the older tribe SUCKS no matter how much they practiced.

What? Older tribe lost? How could that be? Because they didn’t have the coach that would have led them to win. Their. Own. Aging. Fault.

Ball-less is an idiot. Sharing with Ursula. IDIOT. He has got to be a biggest idiot since the stick is the immunity idol comment. She doesn’t really emulate trust…that is until she tells him that Black Hypo has the hidden immunity idol. Does this upgrade him from being an idiot to someone that’s just average? NO. Because she HINTED at it a thousand times by stating that she doesn’t want to break trust with Black Hypo, but Ball-Less couldn’t catch on. Food or not, what an idiot. And he is still Ball-Less because she just locked those suckers up this episode. The key is still within reach. Will he get them out next episode? Excited to find out? Not really.

Jolly Mean Giant had a tearful moment at tribal. I felt for him. He has an issue that he needs to get passed which is you don’t get to have the position you always want. Sometimes you have to take the humbling one. And AGAIN the older tribe got rid of the wrong person…Jimmy the Jolly Mean Giant and they kept the bum knee Mob Boss for what reason? Because of an extra vote. Lame. So as of right now I think someone from the younger tribe is going to win the entire game. These old people ain’t going to have enough in the merge, and as the preview for next week’s episode shows…the merge might happen early. Or maybe it’s a tribal shift.

You can’t go against what you believe is right. You can’t. These people sit there and state “Well….I should do this because I believe in it” and then they do what? The exact opposite. Ball-Less says he shouldn’t trust anyone, but trusts one of the worst person to trust, a girl he’s attracted to. Especially on a show called Survivor. Phoenix says that Mob Boss should go because his bum knee makes him weak, but who does she vote for? Jolly Mean Giant. COME ON people. Why go back on what you believe? You’ll have regrets if you backtrack on your beliefs. Just stick to them and regret won’t hang over you like rotting mistletoe.

I’m on moron overload with The Apprentice and Survivor. My only moment of Reality TV solace is The Amazing Race where people are smart as they appear.

=) Until next time…The Caustic Survivor Fan has spoken.

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