Criss Angel's Magical Bombing of Sin City

In the middle of my post-turkey engorging, tryptophan-induced narcolepsy, it occurred to me that we at the Morgue are remiss.

It seems that amid an economic meltdown and a historical political race, we completely forgot to write a review of Magician cum douchebag Criss Angel's new 100 million dollar spectacular in Vegas.

We reported way back in April that Angel was teaming up with Cirque du Soleil on a new live show at the Luxor hotel. The show, titled "Criss Angel: Believe" had its premiere performance on Halloween night (of course it was Halloween. No Magician worth their weight in gold would pass up an opportunity to perform for an audience on All Hallows Eve.)

Unfortunately, it appears that Angel's latest foray into live theatrical stage magic did not receive the adoring praise the producers were expecting.

In a word, reviews have been terrible.

"For a reported $100 million, Cirque has bought itself its first bona fide bomb." writes Joe Brown of the Las Vegas Sun. Camp followers — the types who relish gems of unintentional badness like “Showgirls” and well, “Springtime for Hitler” — are advised to get tickets soon."

Reed Johnson from the LA Times wrote, "while Cirque's poetic imagery at its best can leave you rubbing your eyes and holding your breath, spectators here are more likely to find themselves stifling a yawn or wincing with embarrassment.

And Doug Elfman of the Las Vegas Review-Journal states: "If Cirque thinks the sleeeeepy-paced execution of the plot in this supposed-$100 million show is engaging, then so would watching a cat poop in a gilded box."

It looks like Criss has his work cut out for him if he expects to have anyone but his fanatical freaks throwing down $100 for a ticket to his little magic shows. But with Criss signed to a ten year contract, I guess he will have plenty of time to perfect the act.


Anonymous said...

I saw the show on Nov. 23rd, 2008. The show is called "Believe".
I can't "Believe" I spent what I spent to see this crap. I can't "Believe" they signed him for 10 years. I can't "believe" that I did not find reviews before the show. The one thing that I can "believe" I would not endorse this worthless garbage of a show for nothing. Take my word for it, go see David Copperfield or Lance Burton. Sorry Criss, your show

Samantha S said...

This show was so, so bad I don't even know where to begin. I honestly went with an open mind; despite the dreadful reviews thus far. One positive thing I can say is that the theater is absolutely beautiful--and that's about it, as far as praise goes. First of all, there was so much smoke in the theater (to cover the trap doors and wires) that I could hardly tell the difference between Criss Angel and the robotic rabbits jumping around. Second, the plot (if one existed at all) was completely UN-recognizable. The "Nick and Jessica Variety Show" (as amateur as it was) had a bigger WOW factor. Third, if for some odd reason, Cirque has decided to add LIVE animals to their otherwise flawed reputation, could they please find another way to rid the doves from the stage besides having them fly into the walls and drop to the seats in the back of the theater when they miss the hole in the wall? Unacceptable. Forth, may I suggest Criss Angel lose the potty mouth and delete the break-dancing parts of the act? How in the world Cirque du Soleil and/or Luxor has lowered themselves to this deplorable level is beyond my wildest imagination. Anyone touting that BeLIEVE is worth $99, $125 or $150 of your hard earned money is clearly on the Luxor or Angel payroll.

The Judge said...

I expected that the show would have some rough points starting out, but it sounds like it continues to be a truly terrible show. Does Angel even care if he sells tickets? Right now I wonder if Cirque lawyers are trying to figure out a way to back out of that 10 year contract.

Anonymous said...

What's even worse, is now he makes comments about his latest WHORE Holly Madison in the show EVERY CHANCE HE GETS.
For instance - "She is as elusive as Holly Madison"
HELLO? Holly Madison isn't ELUSIVE - just write her a big enough CHECK and she'll follow you ANYWHERE!

Or when Criss has to "guess" the word in the box - its ALWAYS RELATED TO THEIR SEX LIFE - GROSS ---- F**K that nasty, dirty looking hag on your own time, but don't mention her CONSTANTLY in a show we PAID to see!

Or when she's in HER COMPED SEAT and stands up when Criss mentions her - and he mentions how OFTEN she has seen the show (does she PAY FOR HER SEAT??? HELL NO!)) - takes everything I have NOT TO GAG.

Why don't you THANK your paying patrons Criss --- God, is that woman SLEAZY.......

Anonymous said...

And now he's appearing on Larry King WITH Holly??? Is an engagement announcement coming?

I thought Larry King was a REPUTABLE journalist - not after this fiasco!

Criss, you worked really hard to get where you are ---- Holly has done NOTHING but show her T&A and LIVE OFF MEN - GET A REAL JOB HOLLY HO! You are DESTROYING what is left of Criss' career!


Anonymous said...

I went to see the Criss angel Believe show on December 8th. I thought the show was great. I dont no were all the bad reviews are coming from. Criss did an awsome job getting the audience involved just as he had in his mindfreak show. Many people go there and expect to see the majorrr stunts of mindfreak. He is in a theatre with a limiited amount of supplies, he wont be able to do the stuff he does on the shows. THe stuff he does do in the show is awsome. when he was on stage and just randomly appears next to you? i think thats pretty cool! i experrienced that and i was amazed. Yes i no the levetation was on wires and trapped doors but no one can levitate so what do you expect him to do. It was a laugh with the guys that accompanied him and i thought the dancers were good. When he introduuced his girlfriend and mom who cares there important to him and he feels the need to introduce them to you. He had a greeat sense of personality. The little tricks he does are intersting and if you just keep a positive mind set the show was great! And the moral of the storey is he was trying to get to that one girl but that other evil girl keeps gettin in the way of it. its not hard to figure out. Over all if you dont compare it to Mindfreak and you just go there with a positive attitude it was a great show!. Great graphics and tricks.

Hollywood Dump on Facebook

In addition to the articles we post here, we also link to stories we think are interesting and post them to our Facebook page. If you're on FB, become a fan!