Luxury Movie Theaters Coming Soon

Even though most people can barely afford to put gas in their innefecient vehicles, Variety is reporting that a group of investors - with clearly more money than brains - are investing $200 million to open 50 luxury movie theaters around the country, betting that movie-watchers will want to watch the same crappy movies shown in other theaters but for $35 a ticket:

Each complex will sport theaters featuring 40 reclining armchair seats with footrests, digital projection and the capability to screen 2-D and 3-D movies, as well as a lounge and bar serving cocktails and appetizers, a concierge service and valet parking.

But the circuit will especially push its culinary offerings -- made-to-order meals like sushi and other theater-friendly foods from on-site chefs (a service button at each seat calls a waiter). Moviegoers will have to pay extra for any food they order, however.

Wow. They are going to serve food in the theaters. Golly, what a revolutionary concept! Of course, the Alamo Drafthouse has been doing that in Austin since 1997 and they do it INFINITELY better than some snooty chef in a starched white coat. Give me a great burger and a micro-brew beer served by a damn-sexy, tattooed chick over some pretentious "Top Chef" wanna-be any day.

"It's a new way to go to the movies," said Graham Burke, managing director and CEO of Village Roadshow Ltd. "It's like what Mercedes is to a Toyota or like flying first class in an airplane."

Actually, its more like Driving a Mercedes around a sewage plant, or a first class seat on a plane being flown by Larry the Cable Guy. Because while they may be adding a lot of flair to the movie theater, the quality of the movies being showed have unfortunately not changed at all. Do audiences really want to spend $35 on a movie ticket so they can watch something like "Meet the Spartans" while sitting in the lap of luxury? I think not. The majority of films released are not worth watching on YouTube, let alone in a cushy pretentious moviehouse.

You can't polish a turd, yet people never stop trying.

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