American Films Redux: Turkish Style

I never knew the Millennium Falcon could fly in reverse or a Star Destroyer upside down. Or that Anything in Star Wars had anything to do with Earth's space program. I had the...pleasure...of watching some Turkish versions of famous American movies from the site English Turkey. I only watched a couple, and a little of each, but man, I'm curious if it would even make sense if I knew the language.

Being the geek that I am, I chose to watch their versions of Star Wars and Star Trek. Never watch crappy versions of your favorite franchises! I viewed the Star Trek first, sitting back and being instantly thrown in, with no credits or anything (that is a relevant point, I'll discuss it later). I see normal activity aboard what I assume to be the Enterprise, after seeing the same model used in The Original Series fly by, although it looked more orange, as did space for that matter. Seeing as how it was the original Enterprise crew (...not Captain Archer...), I was able to distinguish which one was Uhura quite easily. She was the only black-female aboard, and talked to who I assume was the Captain. The Captain came swaggering in a minute or so into the viewing of the clip on YouTube. Through the rapid speech I was able to distinguish what sounded like "McCoy," and saw someone in a blue shirt enter the scene. Shortly after, a Turkish Spock joined them, and despite his shirt being yellow as opposed to the blue a science officer would wear, he didn't look too cheesy. No Nimoy, but passable. The three then had a conversation, with somebody thanking Mr. Spock (I heard "thank you, Mr. Spock, so I wonder if it was broken English, just really fast?), which is all I could gather. Seeing as how I wasn't going to gather anything more, I decided to peruse their gallery, see what else they had to offer.

I stumbled upon Star Wars, and it being my first Sci-Fi love, I had to take a look. After a minute or two of credits (See? It totally was relevant when I mentioned credits earlier, HA!), which were darkened on the sides with a single ring of light illuminating the center, I saw images of a sun, a rocket seeming to belong to one of the early Apollo missions (I could be wrong, it could've been the design for the Russian Space Shuttle, I'm no rocket scientist), which didn't seem to be from a galaxy far, far away, or happening a long time ago. Then I saw familiar images of Rebels, walking around the base preparing their X-Wings for their attack run on the initial Death Star. Then the Death Star. The the Falcon. More random shots of all these ships followed, with clips from the first chase scene in A New Hope with the Star Destroyer bearing down on the Corellian Corvette. Then things got weird, with the Falcon backing up and the Destroyer suddenly being upturned, but engines still firing. The whole while this goes on, the screen is either blue or orange or green, and a voice is speaking over it all, with occasional flashes of the Apollo shuttle again. This went on at least 4 minutes into the film, so I took the liberty of jumping forward. I was rewarded with seeing what I assume were pilots, though the backs of their seats seemed to only be a screen with the movie projected onto it, and me catching glimpses of eitehr the Death Star Trench Run, or flying ships behind them, as if all the actors were just put in front of a giant screen and were told "Go!"

I'm all for other cultures and people sharing and open and junk, and I'm not saying "ARGH!! They have no right, blah blah blah!!" cause just because I have a position here at Media Morgue, and I CAN post my opinion (don't worry, I'll grow into my power eventually ;), on this it doesn't really matter for that, cause I don't care if they do that, they can have all the fun they want with it. It's still good to watch for a good laugh, probably better intoxicated in some way, but man, they are REALLY bad. one of those things you have to say "Oh my god, that was horrible...I gotta get so-in-so to watch these!"

EDITOR'S NOTE: I've watched a few of these and I can attest that yes, they are much more fun when you've had a few shots of your favorite cheap booze. They're great for parties. For more crazy Turkish films, check out English Turkey.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

SWEET! Gotta love the snippets of the first Battlestar Galactica theme and Raiders of the Lost Ark in the Star Wars remake. All cheesiness aside, it's still better than episodes 1-3 ;) .


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