Paris Hilton's Forgotten Sexcapades...Again.

Imagine bidding on the content of someone's unpaid storage locker, hoping to make a few bucks selling off the forgotten belongings and finding out that the locker just happened to belong to Paris Hilton. And imagine that the contents of said locker was not just some musty boxes of paperwork or old clothes she doesn't wear anymore, but a treasure trove of scandalously embarrassing personal memorabilia, x-rated and otherwise.

Now imagine for one second that this isn't some kind of monumentally fucked-up publicity stunt.

For the low monthly price of $39.97, you too can sift through the effluvia of licentious crap Paris left in a storage locker at "Paris Exposed." (note that we would normally provide a link to the site, but it's either going to be taken off line very quickly or the proceeds are secretly being funneled to the ditzy-like-a-fox heiress, and we have no interest in helping this dingbat earn even more money for nothing. If you really want to check it out, do a search. We're sure it wont be hard to find.)

The site contains hundreds of hours of video diaries, sex videos, personal emails, bank statements, medical records and photos of all her wealthy fuck buddies doing all kinds of things most people only dream of.

Of course, the first question anyone who hasn't driven on the wrong side of the freeway might ask is why someone as wealthy as Paris Hilton would leave a bunch of scandalous junk in a storage locker in the first place. Isn't there a more secure location for such debaucherous exploits? Of course there is.

But then, we wouldn't all be talking about her today, now would we.


Anonymous said...

What a cunt.

Anonymous said...

More like attention whore.

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